I'm alive.

That's the main bullet point here.

There was a time where it was looking like that wasn't going to be the case, but I think all that fear and darkness was simply a way of pushing me to where I am now and onto the path that I'm on.

About 5 months ago I was on the brink of suicide. My relationship with my husband completely unraveled and we were both stuck in a confusing, elaborately constructed version of hell. He took his pain out on me and I took my pain out on myself. I could only cope for so long before I thought I couldn't bear it anymore. Something had to change. I either had to die, or rethink my entire life.

I'm sitting here today, so you can guess what I chose. I left my husband, and I'm focusing on myself and trying to climb out of the hole I dug for three years. It's incredibly difficult, but I know for certain that I made the right call.

Also, no more living as a man! That shit sucked yo.